her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
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