they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
