It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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