Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize