OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Quick, to the slutcave!
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Everything about him screamed your future.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
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