i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
