Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
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