just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
