Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Randomize
