Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
