Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize
