i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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