you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
