but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize