I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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