found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
