oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
