i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Randomize
