I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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