I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
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