i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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