and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
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