I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize