Who did Billy Mays play for?
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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