WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Randomize
