i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
I enjoy the company of your penis
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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