Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
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