You're a womanizer and a bitch.
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Randomize
