Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
