I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
