She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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