so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Randomize