ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I need a burrito and a hug.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
