i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
