sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Randomize
