who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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