Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize