what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Randomize
