It's like God shit irony all over that family
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
