Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
