she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
farters have to be the big spoon...
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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