I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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