no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
He felt like a one man threesome
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Randomize
