so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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