Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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