Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
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