A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
