I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
either way he was missing a nipple.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
