it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
