Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
