Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
